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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23621116">Kind Kylo</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Queen_Yvette/pseuds/Queen_Yvette'>Queen_Yvette</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Star Wars [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Bottom Kylo Ren, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Force-Sensitive Reader, Kylo Ren Needs a Hug, Kylo Ren Redemption, Submissive Kylo Ren, The Force</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 17:27:46</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,497</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23621116</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Queen_Yvette/pseuds/Queen_Yvette</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>You had known at an early age that you were Force-sensitive. You had honed your abilities so much so, that you can read someone undetected. And that's how you learned that Kylo Ren wasn't aggressive or crazy or merciless or even reckless. Kylo Ren was a confused and scared little boy who had greatness unwillingly thrust upon him. </p><p>You had also known Kylo Ren for a very long time. You had watched from the background as he rose to power and commanded the First Order. You watched as he tortured, you watched as he killed, you watched as he lead. But above all, you watched as he hurt. Which is why you took it on yourself to change that.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Ben Solo | Kylo Ren/Reader, Kylo Ren/Reader</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Star Wars [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1733938</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>53</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. I See Through You, Kylo Ren</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Please tell me of any errors, inconsistencies, or things I got wrong! Your help is much appreciated!</p>
    </blockquote><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>You know about Kylo Ren, including what he hides behind that menacing mask of his. Which is why it's your goal to help him. He doesn't do it very willingly, though.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Here we go, ya'll! I hope you enjoy this fic about a softer side of Kylo (although chapter one isn't quite to the "softer" side of him yet)!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>You had known at an early age that you were Force-sensitive. You had honed your abilities so much so, that you can read someone undetected. And that's how you learned that Kylo Ren wasn't aggressive or crazy or merciless or even reckless. Kylo Ren was a confused and scared little boy who had greatness unwillingly thrust upon him.</p><p>You had also known Kylo Ren for a very long time. You had watched from the background as he rose to power and commanded the First Order. You watched as he tortured, you watched as he killed, you watched as he lead. But above all, you watched as he <em>hurt. </em>Which is why you took it on yourself to change that.</p><p> </p><p>-----------------------</p><p> </p><p>In front of you was a doorway to a control room where Kylo Ren was throwing a fit. You watched as everyone intending to walk by saw what was going on and turned back around. You, however, stood your ground. It was high time that he learned to control himself, which is where you came in. So you took a deep breath and entered the room.</p><p>The control panel within the room had been slashed to pieces, the metal still glowing red hot. After he had finished with that, he slashed his sizzling lightsaber through a desk and rampaged from there. Sparks and chunks of wood and metal flew until he had reduced the poor desk to smithereens. Only when you loudly cleared your throat did he stop, breathing heavily, and looked at you. </p><p>"I think that's quite enough," you stated.</p><p>He tilted his head at you. "Who are <em>you</em>?"</p><p>"I'm here to help."</p><p>He laughed at you. "I don't need <em>help.</em>"</p><p>You looked around the room for a moment and then side-eyed him. "I disagree. You've broken your <em>own</em> ship in your tantrum."</p><p>The atmosphere suddenly turned serious, filling with tension. </p><p>"Get. Out," he hissed through his mask. </p><p>You cocked your head at him. "What is going on in that head of yours right now, I wonder."</p><p>He inched closer and pointed his lightsaber at you. "If you don't leave, I will kill you."</p><p>"Now, now," you shook your head at him. "I know you don't mean that."</p><p>"Really," he snarled at you. </p><p>He brought his lightsaber up with frightening speed and directed it so it would cut right through your neck. Without breaking eye contact, you thrust your hand up and stopped it mid-air with The Force. </p><p>A surprised gasp left him. He tried to free himself, which proved unsuccessful. You then felt him try to invade your mind, willing you to let him go, which also didn't work. You let him struggle for a second before continuing with what you came in here for: to become a foreground character in his life and help him.</p><p>"Are you finished," you calmly asked.</p><p>"Not until you're dead!"</p><p>He let out a frustrated grunt and pushed harder to break free, struggling against the invisible bonds you held. You leaned in until you were almost touching his mask.</p><p>"I know you're just a confused and scared little boy, Kylo Ren. I see through your charade. And I can help you. The control rooms," you looked around, then back at him, "are not what you should be investing your energy into."</p><p>"You know nothing," he gritted his teeth.</p><p>"We shall see."</p><p>With that, you turned around and strode out of the room, releasing him only once you felt he wasn't going to try and decapitate you.</p><p>You walked back to your quarters, hyper-aware of the fact that Kylo's thoughts lingered on you. You had punctured him with your words, and while he was scared that you could overpower his knowledge and use of The Force, he was even more scared that you were right about him.</p><p>When you reached your makeshift home, you stepped out of your formal general's uniform and into a warm shower. You scrubbed yourself clean and let the warm water soothe you. You hated using The Force to hold people against their will. You'd much prefer they just cooperated. Unfortunately, however, it looked like the Supreme Leader was going to challenge you in the area.</p><p>You hopped out of the shower, dried off, and put on some clean pjs. You then skimmed your bookshelf for a good book and hunkered down into your bed to read for a while, letting Kylo collect his thoughts. It took an hour or so, but eventually, his mind calmed. And then he came knocking on your door. </p><p>You slid out of your bed and walked over to your door, pressing the panel to open it. The Commander stood on the other side, mind wavering at the sight of you. </p><p>"How," was all he asked. </p><p>"I've worked with The Force much longer then you have, Kylo Ren. And I've watched you long enough to know you. Possibly better then you know yourself. <em>And,</em> I've tortured enough people to know the mind, especially under substantial stress. You, as much as you may think, are no different."</p><p>He looked away, contemplating on killing you again. Luckily, the conclusion was not to. </p><p>"Let me help you," you quietly said to him.</p><p>He looked up at you again, hesitating to accept your offer. His desire for internal conflict resolution, however, got the best of him.</p><p>"I want to be free of this pain."</p><p>"Then come," you nodded at him. </p><p>He followed you as you walked past him and made your way through the Finalizer hallways. The two of you walked in silence except for the echos of his heavy footsteps. He wearily followed as you walked through the last hallway and into the middle of the hangar bay, where you sat down on the floor. </p><p>"I don't see what-"</p><p>"Just sit," you interrupted him. </p><p>He looked around for a moment at the happenings of his surroundings and promptly sat down in front of you. You could tell he was tense at the thought of being seen with you. In pajamas, no less.</p><p>
  <em>Such a delicate little soldier.</em>
</p><p>"At ease, soldier. Nobody is looking at us."</p><p>He gave one more glance at the stormtroopers milling about their own business and let himself relax a bit.</p><p>"I'll need to know the basis of you for this to work. Tell me about what you've been through."</p><p>"My past stays out of this," he said firmly.</p><p>"I need to know."</p><p>"No."</p><p>"Fine."</p><p>You looked past his visor and into his mind before he could stop you. Inside was absolute mayhem. Thoughts whirled in his mind of how he was perceived, always needing to seem tough and powerful. He felt so much resentment and responsibility because of who his parents were. A Scoundrel and a Princess, one from nothing who forged into greatness and one born into it. He felt betrayal and the need for revenge because of Luke Skywalker's attempt on his life. He felt restless and reckless, needing to find an outlet to channel his emotions into. And at the center of it all, was fear. Fear of trusting anyone. Fear of the weight of responsibilities. Fear of returning to the light, but fear of ruling the dark. </p><p>You exited his mind to see him sputtering and shaking, hands on the floor. You had opened an old wound inside him. One that had been shoved down and repressed as long and hard as he could possibly manage.</p><p>"The demons you carry, they aren't necessary. You've closed yourself off for fear of getting hurt, but look around you. Everyone is so afraid of you, they would never step out of line. The air tenses when you pass."</p><p>"Stop," he growled.</p><p>You looked straight into his eyes. "You instill the same fear into others as is inside you."</p><p>"Enough," he screamed at you.</p><p>He reached for his lightsaber, rage emanating off of him. You called it to your hand via The Force before he could grab it. Anger only growing, he got up to lunge at you. You rolled out of the way, jumping to your feet. He moved to tackle you, but your movements were quicker and more precise.</p><p>"Kylo," you scolded him. </p><p>Ignoring you, he launched himself at you, missing you but snagging his lightsaber. He immediately ignited it, the plasma as violent as he was. He pointed it at you, close enough so that you could feel its heat.</p><p>"You're a liar! You can't help me, you only want to bring me more pain," he seethed.</p><p>Before you could respond, he swung his weapon at you. You leaned back to avoid the plasma blade and turned around. He wasted to time and came running towards you again, swinging with unkempt rage. You jumped to the side, skidding across the slick floor and putting your right hand down to steady yourself. You looked up to see him readying to attack once more. Before he could, you stood and held your hand out in front of you.</p><p>"Stop," you yelled, blasting a huge wave of The Force from every fiber of your body. Within seconds, the whole hangar was frozen in place. You brought your hand into you and stepped towards Kylo.</p><p>"Being free of the pain doesn't mean the journey won't be painful. The wound needed to be reopened so I could see the root of it all. It will enable your healing process to begin. <em>Correctly</em>, this time."</p><p>After giving him a moment to process what you had said, you freed him and the room from your metaphorical grasp. He just stood still, his breaths shallow and his mind reeling. You dared not say a word. Cautiously, however, you approached him and did what you knew he needed. You hugged him. You pressed his tense body into your own and let him soak in the affection he didn't realize he'd been deprived of. Slowly, he inched his arms up and put them around you in return. After a moment, he finally broke. His gloved hands clutched onto you and he started to sob.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>So??? What are we thinking about the idea of kind Kylo? I'm hyped!<br/>Feel free to lemme know your thoughts in the comments! I love reading them!</p><p> </p><p>Follow my Tumblr. for the latest and greatest updates! <a href="https://www.tumblr.com/blog/queen-yvette">Queen_Yvette</a><br/>Also feel free to join my <a href="https://discord.gg/p3cvvNq">discord server!</a></p><p>-------------<br/>I take requests!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. In the Beginning, there was Love and Stardust</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"The best characters to play are the ones with deep internal conflict." - George Blagden</p><p>You have Hux take over Kylo's responsibilities for the day and then walk with Kylo to a quiet observatory. There, you look out the window into outer space and work with Kylo, beginning to subtly change him for the better. What you don't realize, is the impact you're leaving. But he makes sure to let you know. ~fluff~</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>We really start to see soft Kylo here chillins! Enjoy! &lt;3</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>You hugged him for as long as he needed, letting him soak up the only soft and true affection he'd had in a very long time. </p><p>After a while, you softly spoke. "I'll come see you tomorrow for more training, okay?"</p><p>He pulled away and straightened his posture. "My duties-"</p><p>"Don't worry about your duties. They will be taken care of."</p><p>"By whom?"</p><p>"General Hux will take over for the day."</p><p>You could tell he was still skeptical, but he let it be. You gave him a reassuring smile and walked back to your quarters, leaving him to collect himself. Once you were back inside your personal space, you let out a breath you didn't know you were holding.</p><p>"Tomorrow will be interesting," you muttered to yourself.</p><p>You made your way to your bathroom and got ready for bed. You brushed your teeth, your hair, and washed your face. After you had finished, you trudged over to your room. You eased into bed, deciding against reading some more, turned off the light, and drifted off to sleep.</p><p>_____________</p><p>You woke up at 9 A.M. from a deep sleep, still drowsy. At least you had gotten to semi-sleep in. Usually, you were up at 7.</p><p>You moved to sit on the edge of your bed and groaned. Every muscle in your body was sore from so vigorously blasting every ounce of The Force your being held. Despite the soreness, you got up and put on your general's uniform.</p><p>
  <em>Time to go see Hux.</em>
</p><p>You walked out the door and made your way to the main bridge, where he was most likely to be. You walked quickly, not wanting to keep Kylo waiting.</p><p>You soon got to the bridge and peeked through the doorway. Sure enough, General Hux was standing at the end, talking leisurely to a commanding officer. You smoothed out your uniform, straightening every wrinkle and curve into perfection. You had known Hux long enough to understand that he was clean-cut and precise in everything he did. If you looked sharp, he was far more likely to respect you and more heavily consider your requests. Which was why you entered swiftly, walking with your head up, maintaining a sense of power.</p><p>"General."</p><p>He turned toward you, giving you a slight nod.</p><p>"General."</p><p>You stopped when you got to the end of the bridge and looked out the window for a moment before turning your attention toward him. You got straight to the point, knowing he'd appreciate it.</p><p>"I need you to take over Supreme Leader Ren's duties."</p><p>Hux furrowed his eyebrows. "Is he ill?"</p><p>"No. He will simply be doing some training and I've asked him to step down from commanding for the day."</p><p>"Very well," he turned toward the huge window. "I shall look forward to it."</p><p>"Thank you, General."</p><p>You turned and hastened off the bridge, now heading directly for Kylo's quarters. The walk was only a short distance, but with your internal mix of anxiety and eagerness, it felt forever long. You walked through the bland corridors, lost in your own thoughts. Kylo was not going to be an easy one to get through to. He had barricaded himself in his own little world of violence and self-pity. Luckily, though, you could be patient. </p><p>You knocked softly on his door and waited until he opened it. </p><p>"Are you ready for today?"</p><p>"Yes."</p><p>You smiled and nodded.</p><p>"Now, where to set up camp."</p><p>You considered an interrogation room for its privacy, but decided against it. For Kylo, that room meant pain and torture, the opposite of what you were trying to achieve.</p><p>"There's an abandoned conservatory at the top of the ship," Kylo offered.</p><p>"Why's it abandoned?"</p><p>"No need for it."</p><p>"Perfect, lead the way."</p><p>You walked behind him as he made his way to your destination, silently listening to his thoughts to get a better idea of how he worked. </p><p>
  <em>How can this woman possibly help me?</em>
</p><p>He was doubtful.</p><p>
  <em>How is she so powerful?</em>
</p><p>He was curious.</p><p>
  <em>She's a threat.</em>
</p><p>He was cautious.</p><p>
  <em>Hux better not screw up my duties. </em>
</p><p>He was serious about his responsibilities. </p><p>
  <em>I'll kill him.</em>
</p><p>He tended to overreact.</p><p>You two of you left the elevator and entered the spacious conservatory. You sauntered over to the front window, peering out at the vast universe. Kylo stood next to you in silence, but you could still sense his intensity.</p><p>You started to slowly relax him, seeping calmness into his mind from your own. At first, he resisted, but eventually, his aggressive aura started to dwindle. Your tactics had already begun to work. However, there was still one more thing you needed to implant in his mind. Something to build a foundation on. Not as a command, but as an idea. Because once an idea took hold that was viewed as your own, there was no stopping it.  </p><p>
  <em>Trust me.</em>
</p><p>His subconscious fought against you, clinging to what he knew to mean safety. <em>Trust no one.</em></p><p>It hurt your heart to think that was his safety.</p><p><em>Old habits certainly do die hard.</em> You sidetracked, but quickly caught yourself and retained your hushed mental tone. <em>Trust me. </em></p><p>His subconscious fought. <em>Skywalker</em>. <em>Trusted and betrayed. Pain.</em></p><p>
  <em>You are safe.</em>
</p><p>His internal defenses started to lower at the word "safe". You took the opportunity.</p><p>
  <em>Trust me. You are safe. I mean safety.</em>
</p><p><em>You mean safety.</em> The back of his mind repeated. </p><p><em>No pain. </em>You suggested.</p><p><em>No pain. </em>He accepted. </p><p>"I have a feeling I should trust you," he said suddenly, shifting his weight. "You seem...different, then everyone else."</p><p><em>The idea took. </em>You resisted the urge to jump up and down. </p><p>"Oh?"</p><p>"You seem....ah, what's the word," he mumbled to himself.</p><p><em>Safe.</em> You subconsciously suggested.</p><p>"Safe," he blurted out almost instantly, shuffling his feet at the confusion that he had said that.</p><p>"I'm sorry I-"</p><p>"I'm glad you feel that way."</p><p>He started to say something, to apologize again or correct himself, but ultimately decided against it.</p><p>You suppressed a smile. It worked. He thought of you as safe.</p><p>
  <em>Let's test it, shall we? </em>
</p><p>You looked into his subconscious once again. </p><p>
  <em>Helmet?</em>
</p><p>Alarm bells started to ring inside his mind. Pure panic. <em>Never comes off. Nobody sees.</em></p><p>
  <em>Helmet. Safe.</em>
</p><p>The alarm bells died down a bit, but his subconscious was still unsure of the idea. <em>Helmet.......safe?</em></p><p>
  <em>Yes.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Helmet...safe. Yes.</em>
</p><p>Leaving a moment for the idea to root itself in his mind, you turned to him. "Kylo?"</p><p>"Yes," he turned to face you in return. </p><p>You lifted up your hands and pressed the buttons on either side of his mask, releasing its hold. You removed it slowly, giving him time to counteract your action. When he made no move to do so, you fully removed it from his head and carefully set it on the floor. When you looked back up at him, you could see why he didn't remove it. He had a nasty scar that started just above his right eye and continued down his cheek until it disappeared under his collar. Despite that, however, he was rather dashing. A long face, a chiseled jaw, jet black hair that fell just above his shoulders, and deep hazel eyes. You gave him a genuine smile. </p><p>"Hello."</p><p>His eyes held fear and anger behind them, deeply seeded within him. But not at this moment. At this moment, they were full of childish curiosity.</p><p>"Hi," he let a tiny smile through, but quickly caught himself and turned serious. "Why are you helping me?"</p><p><em>Cautious and curious, there it is. </em>You thought to yourself.</p><p>You pondered. Why were you helping him? You had always been a humanitarian, but you didn't know why your sights were on him specifically. You had just chosen to watch him a long time ago and stuck with it.</p><p>"I guess I just don't want to see anyone in pain. And from what I can tell, you're in a lot. Constantly. But I understand what you've been through and the weight placed on you. Nobody deserves to have so much pain that they put up walls as high as you do."</p><p>You looked into his eyes.</p><p>"All you want is to be loved."</p><p>You were almost thrown backward at the immense wave of emotion that came off of him all at once. You had recognized his pain and longing and something inside him just <em><strong>snapped</strong></em>.</p><p><em>She understands</em>.His subconscious screamed at you, repeating those words. <em>She </em><em>understands</em>. <em>She </em><em>understands</em>. <em>She </em><em>understands</em>.</p><p>What happened next you could have never predicted. Not in one million years, even if you had been told by God himself that it would happen. You would've never believed it.</p><p>Kylo put his hand on the back of your neck, he leaned in, and he gently pressed his lips to yours. Kylo Ren kissed you. And what's more, you kissed him back. Tears fell from his closed eyes onto your cheeks and <em><strong>he kissed you</strong>.</em></p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>BE HONEST, WHO EXPECTED THAT ENDING??? I wrote it and I STILL didn't! Hope you enjoyed! Things are about to get ~steamy~<br/>As per usual, feel free to lemme know your thoughts in the comments!</p><p> </p><p>Follow my Tumblr. for the latest and greatest updates! <a href="https://www.tumblr.com/blog/queen-yvette">Queen_Yvette</a><br/>Also feel free to join my <a href="https://discord.gg/p3cvvNq">discord server!</a></p><p>-------------<br/>I take requests!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Kisses and Issues</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Kylo is a great kisser, and you get to experience that!! But not without some drawbacks. Eventually, you're really able to help Kylo.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Chapter warnings: !!TOUCHY TOPICS!! If you have trouble with past issues and may become distressed or suicidal, THIS CHAPTER MAY BE A TRIGGER! Read at your OWN RISK!<br/>That being said, my dear chillins, if you ever need to talk, please message me! I'm always open to help anyone, should they ever need it. <a href="https://www.tumblr.com/blog/queen-yvette">Queen_Yvette on Tumblr.</a> If you're not comfortable with that, here are some alternate <a href="https://www.mentalhealth.gov/get-help/immediate-help">services.</a><br/>Let us not forget to mention ~fluff~ in this chapter!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was bliss. Pure bliss as Kylo soaked up your lips like water to a parched man, and it seemed to go on forever. His lips were full and soft and <em>delectable. </em>He kissed you with fervor and it was the first time you had been intimate like this in a very long time.</p><p>"Kylo," you pulled back, breathless, the ghost of his lips still lingering.</p><p>He rested his forehead against yours, chest heaving, his presence so close it was intoxicating.</p><p>When he pulled back and looked at you, your heart dropped a little, seeing his eyes slightly puffy from crying. It must've shown on your face because he immediately turned away and wiped his entire face in one swipe of his arm. You quickly brushed his tears off your own cheeks.</p><p>"I'm sorry. I'm never like this." He turned around and straightened his posture. "I....I don't know what got into me."</p><p>You looked down, shame wracking your heart. This was your fault and you knew it.</p><p>"I did."</p><p>"What," he was confused.</p><p>"I got into your head and suggested some things to your subconscious. I was trying to help."</p><p>"You couldn't have. I would've-"</p><p>"Felt it," you questioned, looking him in the eyes. </p><p>He slowly nodded. "Yes."</p><p>"I'm highly trained. I can easily read people undetected. Bypassing the senses of even you."</p><p>Kylo's guard, to your dismay, immediately went back up. "What else have you done to me?"</p><p>"Nothing, I-"</p><p>"What else," he didn't believe you.</p><p>"Nothing," you repeated, more forcefully this time. </p><p>You felt his conflict. He wanted to be angry, to call you some hurtful name and say how you were out to get him, just like everyone else. But the idea had been planted. </p><p>
  <em>I mean safety.</em>
</p><p>"It was for your own good. I can't help you with your guard up."</p><p>"How could you <em>possibly </em>help me," he nearly spit.</p><p>You took a step forward and gently put your hand on his cheek. In a moment, he understood. You were here to be the kindness, the <em>gentleness</em>, he lacked.</p><p>"You harbor so much pent up aggression and rage. So many past experiences you never dealt with, just repressed." You leaned closer. "Let me ease the pain."</p><p>You felt his resentment and hesitation, but it wasn't long until it dwindled away, his understanding replacing it. You took the opportunity to move the last inch forward, pressing your lips against his with the utmost gentleness. You felt as, after a moment of uncertainty, he finally let go and just melted into you. You allowed yourself to relax a bit and stroked his cheek with your thumb as he sucked on your bottom lip. His hands grazed the sides of your body until he reached the belt on your uniform that sat just above your natural waist. He left no time, immediately getting to work on undoing it. You broke the kiss, looked down, and put your hands over his. </p><p>"Not here," you breathed, then looked back up. "Not yet."</p><p>After hesitating for a moment, he agreed. "Okay."</p><p>You grabbed his right hand and sat down, softly tugging on it so he would do the same. As soon as he was situated, you gave him a curt nod and a warning look. He nodded back at you, seemingly knowing what you were going to do.</p><p>You waited a moment, his eyes displaying an innocent, childish fear, despite his confirmation that he was ready. When you felt he truly was, you looked past his eyes and into his mind, picking out the issues to be dealt with that he had long since suppressed. You chose the most prominent ones.</p><p>
  <em>1. High expectations/need to please. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>2. Stress of ruling.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>3. Death attempt/growing up too fast.</em>
</p><p>You backed out after having found what you needed. </p><p>"Let's start at the beginning. High expectations from Mom and Dad."</p><p>He winced. Normally this was where he would get angry and lash out, but he resisted with great effort. </p><p>"They would only expect perfection. And so did Snoke. But I couldn't deliver."</p><p>"But don't you, too? Expect perfection from everyone else? And what happens when it doesn't happen <em>perfectly</em>?"</p><p>"I...find another way."</p><p>"So do you think your parents <em>really</em> thought it was the end when you weren't perfect? Surely they get that you're only human."</p><p>He sat and thought for a moment. You had a point and he knew it. </p><p>"Then what about Snoke?"</p><p>"He wasn't human, so he couldn't possibly have understood. Perfection is impossible, however, even for him."</p><p>Kylo seemed to accept that answer, so you moved on.</p><p>
  <strike> <em>1. High expectations/need to please. </em> </strike>
</p><p>
  <em>2. Stress of ruling.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>3. Death attempt/growing up too fast.</em>
</p><p>"Why do you stress about ruling?"</p><p>"I need to coordinate everything. Manage everything. And they all look up to me. I can't make a mistake."</p><p>"Which ties into your perfection expectations. But do they know you're human? Yes. They don't expect anybody to be perfect. As far as coordinating everything, plan it all out and write it down. If you see the whole picture, go step-by-step. It'll be far less overwhelming. Organizing your thoughts is the best way to go. Meditation is also a great way to focus yourself. Or simply going on a walk to clear your mind works well."</p><p>"Then what do I do when I get angry?"</p><p>"Workout. You have so much adrenaline and energy in that state that investing it into working out and bettering yourself is the best way to go."</p><p>He liked that idea, you could tell. You decided to offer an alternative, nonetheless. </p><p>"You can also retrain your brain. If you don't act on those impulses, your brain will rewire itself to become a calmer person. That way you just won't have the urge to cause damage. To objects, yourself, or others."</p><p>
  <em>Two down, one to go.</em>
</p><p>
  <strike> <em>1. High expectations/need to please. </em> </strike>
</p><p>
  <strike> <em>2. Stress of ruling.</em> </strike>
</p><p>
  <em>3. Death attempt/growing up too fast.</em>
</p><p>"You feel like you grew up too fast?"</p><p>"I trained so hard at the Jedi Academy and pushed myself in everything. I got to be so much that I got stressed and confused and felt the weight of responsibilities so heavily that I wanted to just drop it all and go to the dark side, which seemed to be much freer. Which isn't true in the <em>least." </em>He let out a small, dry laugh.</p><p>"And your Uncle Luke," Kylo grimaced at the mention, "got scared."</p><p>He immediately flared up. "He tried to <em>kill me!"</em></p><p>You put your hand up to quiet him. "People do dumb things when they're scared or under stress. You know this."</p><p>"But he-"</p><p>"I will be hearing no buts," you interrupted. "He was scared. That's all. Whether it was warranted or not, you can't change the past, only learn from it. And people..."</p><p>"...do dumb things when they're scared," he looked up at you for reassurance, which you gladly gave.</p><p>"Or?"</p><p>"Stressed," he finished, mumbling the whole thing. He then tilted his head and looked deep into your eyes. "How are you so powerful? How do you know all this?"</p><p>You chewed your lip, hesitating to tell him about your beginnings. You didn't want to, but you knew if he felt you had something in common, it would help.</p><p>"You're not the only one with a bad background. Some of us just learn to use it to our advantage instead of letting it break or control us. But I was in your exact spot," you paused, "for a very long time."</p><p>Sorrow filled his mind at the idea of your suffering. You decided to cut it short, your own inner demons that you had so arduously contained, threatening to pour out.</p><p>"Is that acceptable? Or are there other things weighing on your mind?"</p><p>He thought for a moment, then shook his head.</p><p>
  <strike> <em>1. High expectations/need to please. </em> </strike>
</p><p>
  <strike> <em>2. Stress of ruling.</em> </strike>
</p><p>
  <strike> <em>3. Death attempt/growing up too fast.</em> </strike>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Again, if these subjects were touchy, message me <a href="https://www.tumblr.com/blog/queen-yvette">here</a> or professional services <a href="https://www.mentalhealth.gov/get-help/immediate-help">here.</a> I hope that what the advice "you" give Kylo may also help others!</p><p>But what did we think is kissing Kylo?? Honestly, I live for it. Sorry about teasing a bit though! I promise there's smut and fluff to come! Stay tuned! And as always, I'd love to know your thoughts! Comments are open down below! \/\/\/</p><p> </p><p>Follow my Tumblr. for the latest and greatest updates! <a href="https://www.tumblr.com/blog/queen-yvette">Queen_Yvette</a><br/>Also feel free to join my <a href="https://discord.gg/p3cvvNq">discord server!</a></p><p>-------------<br/>I take requests!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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